AT-AT Walker Causes Massive Traffic Jam on Willy Street

By Vin Sparks

Yesterday, at about 3:00PM, an All-Terrain Armored Transport (AT-AT Walker) made it’s way down Willy Street in Madison, WI and “walked” up to the main entrance of the Willy Street Co-op causing major traffic backups in every direction.

It was not known at the time it appeared where the heavily armored combat walker used by the Imperial Galactic Empire’s ground forces came from.

“It just sauntered up to the front door and stood there”, said Aldo Reemer, a resident of the area. Witnesses all said that it took nearly 5 minutes before someone emerged from the cockpit of the vehicle and entered the grocery co-op.

Spoofing Willy was on the scene almost immediately and spoke with the AT-AT Commander of the 3-man crew as he left the store to get back into the walker. “It was not our intention to disrupt your commerce in the area”, said the commander who wished to remain anonymous. “The intelligence we received on your planet was not complete”, he continued. “But the reputation of your Willy Street Co-op is known throughout the galaxies as a great place for a Vegan to get the best deli tofu.”

The commander re-entered the walker quickly and navigated it through the halted traffic toward Lake Monona where, somehow, we lost it. By the time police arrived on the scene, the Imperial combat vehicle was gone. If it weren’t for the picture taken by our staff photographer, you wouldn’t even know it was there.

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